DriveThru Whale's Oddities, Crackpot Conspiracy Theories, and Other Cool Stories

[DriveThru Whale]

Good evening, Bienvenue, Moshi moshi, and Vilkommen. My name is DriveThru Whale, and since there have been a recent rash of conspiracy theories, outlandish stories, and other bull**** I find interesting on some level, I have decided to compile them here for your viewing pleasure, you lovable weirdos of the night.

Tonight, we take a look at the phenomenon known as "Meme Magic". The concept is simple. Some anonymous poster creates a meme, or catchy internet slogan, often accompanied by a picture which supports or augments this statement, thereby making it believable to some extent. In this light, a series of coincidences have come to pass coinciding with some of these memes. The death of "Lemmy" Kilmister, David Bowie, and Alan Rickman, along with a recent Michael Jackson sighting are a few of these occurrences.

Now you, the average person, might wonder: Does this "meme magic" come from somewhere or something, or did it simply pop out of nowhere like flies spontaneously generating from garbage? Allow me to put those questions to rest with a backstory. The Ancient Egyptians deitied the primordial darkness as Kek, who took the form of a frog as a man, and as a serpent as a woman. If you do not believe me, I shall quote from the Wikipedia page which I shall link to you so you may see for yourself.
https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kuk_(mythology)

"Kuk (also spelled as Kek and Keku) is the deification of the primordial concept of darkness in ancient Egyptian religion. In the Ogdoad cosmogony, his name meant darkness. As a concept, Kuk was viewed as androgynous, his female form being known as Kauket (also spelled as Keket), which is simply the female form of the word Kuk."

"Like all four dualistic concepts in the Ogdoad, Kuk's male form was depicted as a frog, or as a frog-headed man, and the female form as a snake, or a snake-headed woman. As a symbol of darkness, Kuk also represented obscurity and the unknown, and thus chaos. Also, Kuk was seen as that which occurred before light, thus was known as the bringer-in of light. The other members of the Ogdoad are Nu and Naunet, Amun and Amaunet, Huh and Hauhet."

It is often known that the current hub around the various assortment of memes is Pepe the frog, which is responded to by the word "Kek". This gives a strong indication that meme magic is, indeed, real.

That's all the time a have for today, I am afraid. Please do join us next time for more of the arcane, supernatural, and extranatural. I am DriveThru Whale. Please do enjoy your evening. Good night.

[DriveThru Whale]

Hello there, DriveThru Whale again, here with another conspiracy theory that could actually make sense. Today we will discuss the new Angry Birds movie, which turns out to be a little vague allegory to the Islamic immigrant crisis in Europe of 2015-2016.

The average European is a red bird. Said bird is outcasted because of facts interpreted as hate speech by liberal government. Suddenly the pigs show up on a giant boat, larger than anything that had been seen before. The birds asked legitimate questions about why they are here and what they plan to do. The birds are almost immediately bullied and beaten up (or worse). Pigs start looting every last egg (related to fertility and demographics). The liberal birds make excuses on why this is happening, while the conservatives seek help from a BALD EAGLE. Hmm, who could that symbolize?

On that note, why are you not taking your kids to the best family movie ever?

This concludes another redpill moment from your friendly DriveThru Whale. Take care, and good night!